After sweet and intimate call last night opening into the heart chakra, I had quite a journey today. As we explored our relationship with The Divine through the heart chakra meditation we did during the call last night, moving into “the Kingdom/Queendom of Heaven within” and getting in touch with our Heart’s Desire I felt such a beautiful sense of community and a lot of energy being released. Thanks to everyone who participated last night. I continue to be amazed by the intimate space we’re able to create on these calls.
Facilitating this 7-week Awakening series is really giving me a chance to practice what I preach. I woke up this morning feeling the bliss and peace from a good night’s sleep. The Doorway to Your Dreams meditation has not only been stimulating some powerful and lucid dreams but also taking me into powerful states of relaxation, healing and even bliss. I’ll often wake up feeling healed and rejuvenated yet very quickly I fall into heavy energy… anxious feelings of dread, impending doom and all the things that can go wrong if I get out of bed. I want to pull the covers over my head and go back into dreamland rather than face the day. This has been a pattern for me off and on since childhood, which I can trace back the sexual abuse which happened in the dark of night and that I blocked for many years. My sister reminded me of that a week or so ago when I shared with her this feeling of impending doom which has been surfacing lately. There are certainly plenty of things going on in my life that I can hang that feeling on… plenty of projections of things that “could go wrong” or “might not work out” and I could easily attach this feeling to that old story of “there’s something wrong with me.” and “things never work out.” and thus give it power to create what I don’t want . However, my sister, God bless her, said “the doom already happened and you lived through it.” That started the tears flowing, and the realization that this is part of the healing, and the awakening process of the this 7-week series. The deep healing states in my dreams are clearing my solar plexus, the 3rd chakra. I was told years ago that as we move in and out of sleep, we move through the astral field which carries the emotional memory and residue of traumatic events that were too powerful for us to process and clear completely when they happened. We will pickup that residue as we move out of sleep. I believe this also happens as we move out of a deep meditation. That’s why I will often end a meditation with some ohms. The vibration clears the astral field. Hmmmm, it might be a good idea to try this first thing in the morning.
Last weekend I went to a Oneness event with Stuart Mooney where he described the chakras as wheels; energy wheels with petals, like flowers of light or energetic fans that spin. He explained that the awakening process is the awakening of the Kundalini, a concentrated field of intelligent, cosmic invisible energy ( The Biology of KUNDALINI by Jana Dixon) located in the root chakra. When the Kundalini awakens it begins to rise seeking union with our individual Divine or Soul energy located in the Soul Star Chakra the 8th chakra located above the head. As it rises it causes the chakras to spin faster seeking balance and harmony with our soul energy. The petals, however have accumulated a lot of gunk though our many lifetimes, and from our ancestors through our DNA. As the chakras spin faster this gunk starts to fly off and it can feel “like the shit is hitting the fan, because, in a way, that’s exactly what’s happening.” Those were Stuart’s word, and it was so validating for me to hear this, because this is just what I’ve been experiencing and when I can remember not to identify with these heavy emotions by attaching them to some old story I have about myself and just feel them, trusting that THIS IS THE HEALING FEELING, they move through.
Below is the info from the Crystal card I drew before last night;s call:
Purification: Bloodstone — From Liquid Crystal Oracle by Justin Moikeha Asar
If Bloodstone had come to you today, it is possible that your heart is just not in your physical activities, allowing life to become boring and one paced. Bloodstone, the Stone of Purification, signals renewal revitalization and healing, leading to the re-establishment of your spirit as your guiding light towards life purpose. For you this means change and a new way, but first there must be a period of purification and clearing. Drink lots of water and eat as cleanly as possible while Bloodstone does her work.
A new you is to be born, remember that, before the Caterpillar can see the light and fly as the glorious butterfly, it is restricted attached and blind in its Self Created Physical cocoon.